Cue the Whitesnake, because here I go again

In the blink of an eye, the day is here for Surgery No. 2. And not a moment too soon.

The need for this one -- a total replacement of my left hip, for the first time -- has become stunningly obvious over the last few weeks. As my right hip has gotten stronger, more flexible and completely pain-free since it was "revised" two and a half months ago, the limitations of the left hip has become apparent. It hurts all the time now. It wakes me up at night throbbing. My leg is completely inflexible.

This is an unusual situation for me. For years, the left leg has been the strong one, the good one. When, in 1993, I first developed sharp, blinding pain in my right hip, one of the things that my surgeon then pointed out on the X-ray was that the left leg appeared to be in just as bad shape as the right -- no cartilage to speak of between the femur and the hip socket. But if it didn't hurt, he shrugged, don't worry about it.

So that's what I did, for years. Even as occasional soreness popped up, I chalked it up to activity or weather or just a bad day. And when it became increasingly difficult to move, I figured well, maybe if I exercise or lose weight. When it got so bad I could barely tie shoes, I bought slip-ons. And when it became obvious that these surgeries were necessary, I of course had the right done first, because the replacement already in there had "failed" and was in danger of causing serious damage. So I asked the left leg to hold out a little longer and bear the brunt of rehabbing the right again.

Now, the price of all that inattention is pretty clear. My left leg is fucking killing me. So, I'm off this morning to have that hip replaced.

Dr. Badass says this procedure will only take about an hour, and the recovery is expected to be dramatically quicker than the first -- 4-to-6 weeks, as opposed to 6-to-8 for the revision. The incision will be smaller, and the restrictions fewer.

I have almost no trepidation about this one. The first, I was very much ready to do, but I was of course nervous. Not this time. The recovery in my right leg has been so dramatic -- that's part of the reason, I think, that the left now seems so bad, because I have something close to normal to compare it to -- that I can't imagine how good the left is going to be. I can't fathom what it will be like to bend over without holding on to something to steady myself. I cannot picture walking straight, without one leg or the other swinging out for balance. I don't know what it will be like to be able to sit with both feet even on the floor, or to stand with my feet point forward, not bowing out.

But I'm eager to find out.

There will be intense physical therapy again, this time with a heavy focus on gait training to unlearn all the bad habits I've picked up to compensate for these two very bad hips. There will be restrictions on bending and crossing my legs, and, I'm sure, at least a few miserable nights sleeping on my back.

But after just a few weeks of that...it will be over. I will be healthy. My life will be mine again, and I won't have to approach every moment of it wondering, can I do this, or can I handle that, or how much will this hurt?

In short, I'm a month or so away from an open door that leads to the life I've always wanted. I hate to be laid up over Christmas and New Year's, especially with a new love whom I want to celebrate with. But the new me, the repaired me, will finally be in shape to make it up to her. And I will. Every chance I get.

So the iPod is loaded, the bag is packed, and we're off, again, to Pine Creek Medical Center. This time, I can see the destination on the horizon. It looks glorious.